A Shadow of your former self
Cycling in My Shadow
Today I went cycling for the first time in three weeks. Since getting covid, I have only gone for a few walks. I was a little worried about my cycling ability. My trip was an easy 70kms but there was a little wind. It wasn’t too difficult but I am a little tired now and my butt hurts. I am a shadow of my former self. In 2016, I made an effort to see how far I could cycle in one year. I cycled over 21,000kms. Every other week, I did a 200km ride and a recovery ride. I cycled a lot with Korea Randonneurs and even did a ride over 600kms!
I didn’t even do one ride over 200kms last year. To be fair, I was also dealing with a pretty severe injury. This year, I am planning to a cycling tour to the East coast. I am still waiting for official approval, but the trip should be sometime in June. I need to start training. I am a planning on doing over 100kms each day for 10 days. I don’t think I could do that at my current physical level.
Meaning
A shadow of your former self means that you are not as good as you were when you were younger. It usually means that you are less strong, energetic, or powerful. However, this phrase can be used in regards to usefulness, health, influence, capability, or happiness as well. It says that you are not as good as you once were. Similar phrases include A shadow of your old self and A ghost of your former self.
Example: Since his divorce, he has been a shadow of his former self.
Origin
A shadow of your former self dates back to the 1500s. Originally, it was a hyperbole for being emaciated. Emaciated means that the person is extremely thin due to starvation. Over time, it was used in other circumstances. For example, in 1815, Sir Walter Scott wrote, “He appeared to wither into the shadow of himself.” I found it difficult to find information on the history and origin of this relatively common phrase. That surprised me. Perhaps it is not as common as I thought?
Bonus:
Keith Arnatt was a conceptual photographer. From 1968 to 1971, he experimented with shadows. At some point between 1969 and 1971, Arnatt stood in front of Newport College Art department. He had his shadow outlined in chalk and filled with a semi-transparent paint. When he walked away, his “shadow” remained. He called his work Portrait of the Artist as a Shadow of his Former Self. This, of course, is a literal interpretation of today’s phrase, but I thought it was interesting enough to include.
See Also: A blast from the past, The other day
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Resources:
https://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/a+shadow+of+former+self
https://www.dictionary.com/browse/shadow-of-one-s-self
https://www.tate.org.uk/art/artworks/arnatt-portrait-of-the-artist-as-a-shadow-of-his-former-self-p13143